Since I am now a fashion guru, its time to talk skin care. RSS users will need to got to my actual site for this. If you want to achieve the pinnacle of sailing fashion, like me, your going to have to work on your skin.
Foot Care for Dummies.
Given that Nvidia or somebody bought out the Body Shop, and probably test it on kittens etc these days and homoeopathy's even more bollocks than the BNP you'll have do find your own way of creating perfect skin. Nobody but that Annie McSomething woman who used to get actual work on telly and in films but now just does adverts will help you. Not that she looks up to much. Even wearing all that wrinkle cream you still can't even get a job as an extra on The Bill. face it, 'ts not working!
I digress. Tom's perfect skin is achieved by balming his feet in a special mix of Bilge Water, shredded alternator belt and accumulated diesel exhaust particulate. This is easily obtained from the engine room of any small yacht. In fact, can you believe it, its free!
This stops the skin drying out in the intense sun, and subtly lubricates the skin to stop the 6 Pa'anga (£2) Tongan Flipflops from rubbing on the dinghy ride to the pub. It can be tricky to get it out from under the toe nails.
The trouble with dinghy rides to the pub is the salt water, which never really dries and can case dampness of the foot - which like communal showers leads to athletes foot. Sand and the aforementioned quality Tongan Flipflops or Bata Malaysian slip ons can rub before you can get the stuff back out again.
We've all had sand chafe, but fear not I can fix it. A light dusting of flour will fix both problems for you. For correct application add the flour to the bowl, mix warm water with sugar and yeast in it, add a little salt and a tablespoon full of oil. And mix, carefully. If done in a seaway this will result in just the right amount of flour being deposited on each foot. As a bonus with a bit of kneading and an oven you get some bread as a side effect. see my bread making tips.
"WARNING: Do not use Tom's feet in the preparation of food"
On Island Kea my feet are actually as clean as they've ever been. The reason we are Tail End Charlies, as we identified our selves on the Thursday SSB quiz night is cos we were waiting for the spares for the water maker. It works, properly at last. I'm going to have a shower tonight. We've sailed 2400 odd miles and have a full tank of water. I was slightly concerned we'd be lat for the Daniels bay trip in Nuku Hiva, things are looking up wind and boat speed wise.
During the briefing by the Rally, I had to interject that you can only go to the Gendamerie at certain times of day to check in in the Marquesas. The rally informed me I was wrong. I wasn't, they've announce this morning you can only check in between 7 and 11 am. Again, three time across this ocean, maybe I am what passes for an expert round here? I hope we can check in Sundays, I don't think we'll make 11am Saturday, 11am Sunday's a possibility. We ran faster than all the boats left in the fleet bar Aqualuna yesterday. 143 Miles, running all night with a Cruising Chute is why. I reckoned a few days back we need to make 120 a day to get in Sunday. the previous 2 runs would be lucky to scrape that. Yesterday has probably fixed that with interest. Still running well, both in terms of speed and direction. Forecast too now has a bit more wind.
1 A balm is the most dangerous animal found on South Pacific Islands.2
2 That gag copy-write Monty Python 1979.