Oceanhippie.net - Tom's Blog

If you can read this the beer fell off

Rick fell off my boat, like many before him.

 He blames me for this as at the time I was trying to get the lid off a water bottle when we found a big hole in a gusty 20kn sou'easter. He gave me a nice camelback style water backpack with a dinking tube as a solution which I have worn religiously ever since and works really well. 

Another issue with Shaw Thing is there’s only a few pockets upfront to store stuff in reach, usually full of radio, speaker string, sail ties, water bottles, three left gloves*, etc. With no spinnaker cleats, and no mainsheet cleat usually beer has to be left on deck and spills often. 

This is possibly a crime in the Northern Territory and more over leads to the crew smuggling in extra beer which is extra weight!

However my bright spark crew on Sunday worked out that they can use my camel back as a stubbly holder and put their beer in with even while hiking. I am ok with this since the weight is in the right place, and whilst they might be indifferent to my plight they’ll probably want to save the beer.

 * pro tip turn one of the gloves inside out and wear it on the right.

The boys are back (time at the bar please)

I haven't watched much of Jeremy Clarkson's Farm. Despite watching Top Gear and the Grand Tour which has absolutely categorically come to an end. One of the bits I did watch consisted of him failing, expensively, at something or other and saying "I guess I shall have to  present another episode of Who Wants to be a Millionaire? to pay for this" 

While Clarkson does spout a load of guff he's not wrong being a TV Celeb pays way better that farming and the hours are way better. His farm is famously not turning a profit, not that it was meant too. it was an inheritance tax dodge. He's got a farm shop, I like farm shops I was in the UK recently. I didn't visit it. Now he's got a pub too, I was in the UK recently, I like pubs, I didn't visit it. Heard its not going well. He's got a beer too, not seen it anywhere, I like beer, didn't buy any. And a Gin, same. Lets assume that's no more successful than his beer or pub.  Oh and he's brought farming into the spot light YAY! and inertance tax loopholes on agricultural land. Labour are changing the law.  

James May also has a pub, now James May's tastes might be better than Clarkson's, but they are a bit niche, his pub will almost certainly have a very pleasant, quiet vibe. Quiet as in not very busy. He's also advertising a a Gin.  I was in the UK recently, I like pubs, I didn't visit it, I like gin didn't buy any.

I don't watch daytime telly so no idea what Richard Hamond is doing maybe he's running an American style diner in Birmingham? Good luck with that. Any way their back on Prime with a "The Not Very Grand Tour" 

I wonder why? Maybe it pays better that Gin, or Pubs or Farming? Funny who else had failed at business repeatedly but succeeded at telly? Oh yes Donald J Trump  failed businessman bailed out by TV. If Trump Steaks hadn't gone bust Clarkson could sell them in his farm shop! 

Well the moral of this story is don't let TV celebs run your pub or county. How hard can it be? Quite a lot harder than Telly. Thank god Clarkson doesn't think he can run the UK. 

The not very grand tour will be on Amazon Prime, I don't have Amazon Prime. Hang on for fucks sake I do have prime? WHY? AMAZON you bastards! In the words of James May "permission to say 'cock'!"